七、戒語(yǔ)句重復(fù)
漢語(yǔ)多重復(fù),以強(qiáng)化語(yǔ)氣;英語(yǔ)則要盡量避免重復(fù)。
先生曰:“狼負(fù)我,狼負(fù)我!”狼曰:“吾非固欲負(fù)汝。天生汝輩,固需吾輩食也?!?/p>
"You are an ungrateful beast," complained the man.
"Not at all," retorted the wolf, "it is not that I'm ungrateful, but you men were created for us to devour."
(顏惠慶譯《馬中錫·中山狼傳》)
王曰:“此鳥(niǎo)不飛則已,一飛沖天;不鳴則已,一鳴驚人。”
"The bird may not have flown yet", replied the King,"Once it does, it will soar to the sky. I may not have cried out yet, but once it does, it will startle everyone."(楊憲益譯《史記·滑稽列傳》
阿凡提借了財(cái)主一錠金子,還他時(shí)給了他兩錠。
Afanty borrowed a small ingot of gold from a moneybags, but repaid him two ones.(選自艾臨《幽默新大陸》)
以上粗體字都是為了避免重復(fù),下面兩句中的粗體字屬于省譯,當(dāng)然也是為了避免重復(fù)。
又斗爭(zhēng),又團(tuán)結(jié),以斗爭(zhēng)的手段,達(dá)團(tuán)結(jié)之目的。
Unity, struggle, unity through struggle.
中國(guó)人也好,外國(guó)人也好,死人也好,活人也好,對(duì)的就是對(duì)的,不對(duì)的就是不對(duì)的。
What is right is right and what is wrong is wrong, no matter what it concerns, the Chinese or foreigners, the dead or the living.
為了避免重復(fù),還可將相同的漢字故意譯成不同的英文,如
在78歲高齡的人的眼里,大多數(shù)人都顯得有點(diǎn)年輕。倘若美利堅(jiān)對(duì)44歲以下的人抱有不信任態(tài)度的話(huà),它必將阻止杰佛遜起草獨(dú)立宣言,阻止華盛頓領(lǐng)導(dǎo)獨(dú)立戰(zhàn)爭(zhēng),阻止麥迪遜制訂憲法,甚至阻止哥倫布發(fā)現(xiàn)新大陸!
In the eyes of a 78-year old person, most people seem to be little young. If the USA embraces mistrustful attitude to those who are under 44, it would clog necessarily Jefferson from drafting the Declaration of Independence, obstruct Washington from leading Independent War, prevent Madison from formulating the Constitution, and even keep Columbus from discovering the New Continent!
從渲染藝術(shù)效果來(lái)講,重復(fù)并非絕對(duì)不允許的,如:
行路難,行路難。
多歧路,今安在?
長(zhǎng)風(fēng)破浪會(huì)有時(shí),
直掛云帆濟(jì)滄海!
Hard is the way, hard is the way.
Don't go astray! Whither today.
A time will come to ride the wind and cleave the waves,
I'll set my cloudlike sail to cross the sea which raves.
(許淵沖譯《李白·行路難》)
八、戒另起爐灶,走失精氣神,淪為法國(guó)作家梅納日所批評(píng)的 “不忠的美人”——即語(yǔ)言?xún)?yōu)美但不忠于原文。(參見(jiàn)2005年08月26日《濟(jì)南日?qǐng)?bào)》:艾臨文章《不忠的美人與忠實(shí)的美人——寫(xiě)在〈每天幽它一默〉出版后》)嚴(yán)復(fù)在翻譯《天演論》時(shí)偶有為“雅”而不“信” (見(jiàn)陳廷佑《英文漢譯技巧》)。譯文要力求其“信”,盡可能契合漢語(yǔ)原來(lái)句子的氣勢(shì)、情緒和結(jié)構(gòu)。
例如,元朝人王實(shí)甫寫(xiě)下了《西廂記》,張雪靜改編后并作了翻譯——
掏出張生那封信,回頭環(huán)視見(jiàn)梳妝臺(tái)上的梳妝盒,眼睛一轉(zhuǎn),心里說(shuō)有了,將信放了進(jìn)去,合上蓋時(shí)故意壓了一角露在外面。
Rose took out Zhang's letter, she thought, "It would be better to put it in her make-up case, and letter find it herself." So she put the letter in the case, leaving a corner of it sticking out, so that it would be quickly noticed.
不難看出,譯文與原文相去甚遠(yuǎn),互不吻合,成了“兩張皮”。
我們不希望這件事影響中美關(guān)系。
China hates to see Sino-US relations damaged by this incident.
用China hates to比"We don't hope"貼切。
吾十五有志于學(xué),三十而立,四十而不惑,五十而知天命,六十而耳順,七十而從心所欲不愈矩。
At fifteen, I had my mind bent on learning truth; at thirty, my words deeds were appropriate; at forty, I perceived truth and doubts ceased; at fifty, I understood what heaven had mandated for mankind; at sixty, I could comply with the appointments of heaven; at seventy, I could do as my heart desired, and never swerved from the path of right.(金沛霖譯《論語(yǔ)》)
你已經(jīng)死在過(guò)深的怨憤里了嗎?
死?不,不,我還活著——
請(qǐng)給我以火,給我以火!
Have you perished in this deep rancor and bitterness?
Death? No, no. I'm still alive.
Please give me a light, give me a light!
(歐陽(yáng)楨等譯《艾青·煤的對(duì)話(huà)》)
結(jié)語(yǔ)一:別以為有本詞典就可動(dòng)手翻譯了,再好的詞典也不能解決所有的問(wèn)題。詞典是死的,人是活的,現(xiàn)實(shí)生活是千百萬(wàn)化的,詞典易得,翻譯家難覓?!胺g可能是宇宙進(jìn)化迄今所產(chǎn)生的最復(fù)雜類(lèi)型的事情?!边@成了翻譯界的一句名言。翻譯不僅要求譯者有較高的英文水準(zhǔn),對(duì)各種句式成竹在胸,脫口而出,還要精通漢語(yǔ),吃透中文的精神內(nèi)涵。后者往往是被人們忽視的,相對(duì)反倒是更重要的,很多人英語(yǔ)寫(xiě)得洋洋灑灑,漢語(yǔ)譯得艱澀拗口,問(wèn)題多出在這里。只有知難而進(jìn),學(xué)貫中西,才能筆筆如刀,游刃有余。光懂英語(yǔ),或只懂漢語(yǔ),都是做不好英漢翻譯工作的。
結(jié)語(yǔ)二:由于對(duì)翻譯歸屬的認(rèn)知有分歧,導(dǎo)致了譯文風(fēng)格上的明顯的反差。南京大學(xué)的許鈞認(rèn)為翻譯是科學(xué),1+1=2;北京大學(xué)的許淵沖認(rèn)為翻譯是藝術(shù),1+1〉2。爭(zhēng)論仍在繼續(xù)。我不想、也無(wú)力充當(dāng)“二許之辯”的和事佬,不光因?yàn)樗麄兪敲恕⑹谴蠹?,我只想保留自己的?jiàn)解。竊以為筆者系調(diào)和論者,在翻譯上科學(xué)性和藝術(shù)性兼而有之,就不同的體裁各有倚重。因?yàn)樵谠?shī)歌翻譯方面,我傾向是藝術(shù),1+1〉2,賦予張力,收放有據(jù);在論文、科技翻譯方面,我主張是科學(xué),1+1=2,信守嚴(yán)謹(jǐn),毫厘不爽。我記起傅雷1951年在《高老頭》重譯序言里講過(guò)的話(huà),“即使最優(yōu)秀的譯文,其韻味較之原文仍不免過(guò)或不及”??梢?jiàn),“度”的控制是何等的困難。基于這一理念,我對(duì)文中例句未作太多點(diǎn)評(píng),僅僅以加粗的傾斜字體簡(jiǎn)單地提醒和強(qiáng)調(diào),把裁判權(quán)交給讀者。畢竟,譯作無(wú)定本,眾人即圣人,讀者才是真正的上帝。
(來(lái)源:手拉手外語(yǔ)翻譯網(wǎng) 作者:艾臨,山東工會(huì)干部學(xué)院英語(yǔ)副教授,著有《每天幽它一默》(英漢)等)
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