七、戒語句重復

漢語多重復，以強化語氣；英語則要盡量避免重復。

先生曰：“狼負我，狼負我！”狼曰：“吾非固欲負汝。天生汝輩，固需吾輩食也。”

"You are an ungrateful beast," complained the man.

"Not at all," retorted the wolf, "it is not that I’m ungrateful, but you men were created for us to devour." （顏惠慶譯《馬中錫·中山狼傳》）

王曰：“此鳥不飛則已，一飛沖天；不鳴則已，一鳴驚人?！?/span>

"The bird may not have flown yet", replied the King, "Once it does, it will soar to the sky. I may not have cried out yet, but once it does, it will startle everyone."

（楊憲益譯《史記·滑稽列傳》

阿凡提借了財主一錠金子，還他時給了他兩錠。

Afanty borrowed a small ingot of gold from a moneybags, but repaid him two ones. （選自艾臨《幽默新大陸》）

又斗爭，又團結，以斗爭的手段，達團結之目的。

Unity, struggle, unity through struggle.

中國人也好，外國人也好，死人也好，活人也好，對的就是對的，不對的就是不對的。

What is right is right and what is wrong is wrong, no matter what it concerns, the Chinese or foreigners, the dead or the living.

八、戒另起爐灶，走失精氣神，淪為法國作家梅納日所批評的“不忠的美人”——即語言優美但不忠于原文。（參見2005年08月26日《濟南日報》：艾臨文章《不忠的美人與忠實的美人——寫在〈每天幽它一默〉出版后》）嚴復在翻譯《天演論》時偶有為“雅”而不“信”（見陳廷佑《英文漢譯技巧》）。譯文要力求其“信”，盡可能契合漢語原來句子的氣勢、情緒和結構。

例如，元朝人王實甫寫下了《西廂記》，張雪靜改編后并作了翻譯——

掏出張生那封信，回頭環視見梳妝臺上的梳妝盒，眼睛一轉，心里說有了，將信放了進去，合上蓋時故意壓了一角露在外面。

Rose took out Zhang’s letter, she thought, “It would be better to put it in her make-up case, and letter find it herself.” So she put the letter in the case, leaving a corner of it sticking out, so that it would be quickly noticed.

不難看出，譯文與原文相去甚遠，互不吻合，成了“兩張皮”。

我們不希望這件事影響中美關系。

China hates to see Sino-US relations damaged by this incident.

用China hates to比“We don’t hope”貼切。

吾十五有志于學，三十而立，四十而不惑，五十而知天命，六十而耳順，七十而從心所欲不愈矩。

At fifteen, I had my mind bent on learning truth; at thirty, my words deeds were appropriate; at forty, I perceived truth and doubts ceased; at fifty, I understood what heaven had mandated for mankind; at sixty, I could comply with the appointments of heaven; at seventy, I could do as my heart desired, and never swerved from the path of right. （金沛霖譯《論語》）

你已經死在過深的怨憤里了嗎？

死？不，不，我還活著——

請給我以火，給我以火！

Have you perished in this deep rancor and bitterness?

Death? No, no. I’m still alive.

Please give me a light, give me a light! （歐陽楨等譯《艾青·煤的對話》）

（來源：新東方）