It's surprising but true: In a male-dominated society where many people still want boy babies, boys lag far behind girls academically and they're turning into sissies.

One seven-year-old first-grade boy in Shanghai sometimes bursts into tears when told that his school work is poor. A 10th grader still wants his mother to wash his back in the bath and cuddle him until he falls asleep. A fresh college graduate is so bashful and insecure that he doesn't know how to approach girls and has taken a course on dating.

They are examples of China's soft and bashful boys who need toughening up. They speak quietly, they're hesitant and hang back and many lack the drive that will see them through school and into adulthood. Some are quite effeminate, members of the "flowery boy" generation, and there are famous examples of boys having trouble tying their shoelaces because their mothers have done it for them for years.

One of the strongest indicators of the "boys problem" - some call it a crisis - is their overall academic performance.

While many are brilliant and some are high achievers, a great many have been left in the dust academically and overshadowed and outperformed by their assertive girl classmates.

Save the boys. This is the urgent message of educators Sun Yunxiao, Li Wendao and Zhao Xia from Beijing's Capital Normal University in their latest (summer 2010) book, "Rescue Our Boys."

It encapsulates the ongoing debate about feminization of boys and is especially meaningful in Shanghai where men are famously described and caricatured as being passive, mild and dominated by mothers and wives.

A teacher (Wang Guangqiang) in Shenzhen tells Shanghai Daily in a letter that he is distressed by the "grotesque" appearance of a boy dressed as a girl in a recent TV competition (Opinion Page 6, "Pampering and too many women turn boys into weaklings").

"I've noticed the disturbing phenomenon that some boys are more withdrawn, timid and unadventurous than girls ... less assertive, valiant and willing to compete," he observes. He concludes: "Shall we do something about this?"

The authors concur. "After more than 18 months of study and research, we're surprised to discover that the 'boys problem' in China is worse than we expected," says Li, a researcher at the university's Education College.

For years, he has been studying the relationship between gender and education.

"The state of boys in China is an urgent issue that we must face and tackle," he told Shanghai Daily in a recent interview.

The authors analyze official statistics, research and studies carried out in more than 100 schools and universities over 10 years. Their conclusion: Chinese boys and young men are in full rout, from academics to health and physiques to psychological stamina and stability.

From primary school to university as girls and young women overwhelmingly take top grades, honors and leadership roles.

In one survey carried out among 600 Shanghai primary and middle school students, girls get higher scores than boys by about 20 percent and are far and solidly ahead in subjects such as Chinese, English and math. (See sidebar, Boys by the numbers.)

A similar academic gender gap also observed in the West and other countries where girls outperform boys, but the situation appears especially serious in China where decades of a one-child policy have focused all parental attention on a single child. It's also ironic that boys appear especially at a disadvantage in a male-dominated society where many people prefer boy babies.

This general state of affairs the authors and many others attribute to China's rigid education system that doesn't accommodate boys' and girls' differing physiological and brain development; pressure to perform; overprotection and pampering by parents and grandparents; and an environment at home and school that is dominated by women and lacks strong male role models.

"For years we've focused more on girls' rights to receive equal education. But we unintentionally neglected boys and their worsening crisis," says coauthor Sun, also deputy director of the China Youth Research Center. If this continues, we will have a new gender imbalance," Sun says.